Love & Books: Matchmaker, Matchmaker…

20th July, 2009 7 Comments

When it comes to meeting the love of your life (or the hour…), dating websites, books, and gurus all say that you “have to get yourself out there!”  Sitting around at home reading books isn’t going to work as a plan of attack for meeting people.  Most dating advice sources will give you a few suggestions about where to go to meet people, some of which are general suggestions (the park, a bar), while others are niche/interest specific (karate class, art gallery).  One that pops up regularly on such lists is the bookstore or library.

In our survey, we asked Stacked readers if they’d ever met or gone out with someone they had met in a bookstore, and the response was almost unanimous…they all loved the idea but were always too busy looking at the books to notice any people.  Apparently using your local Barnes & Noble as a singles joint only works if you don’t actually read and are there specifically to scope out the hotties.  Even if they went in with that intention, I don’t know a single avid reader who wouldn’t be distracted by a display table.

Now, the big chain bookstores are a bit tough–they’re so big, cold, and rather impersonal.  Maybe it’s easier to make a love match at an independent shop where the staff knows the reading taste of their regulars–they could play the role of matchmaker, setting customers up based on their conversations and book preferences.  Word Bookstore is actually attempting to take that challenge on after a regular commented on a special order of books she had noticed and asked store manager, Stephanie,  if the person for whom they’d been ordered was a single man (and if Stephanie wouldn’t mind setting them up). 

Stephanie took the idea of offering “matchmaking” services in the store to Christine, owner of Word, and a plan was hatched:  in the store singles can fill out a form and post it on a reserved cork board for other singles to look over.  Each time I’ve been by, the staff is chatting up a storm with the customers, offering recommendations.  I commented on this to Stephanie and asked if any of the staff had done their own matchmaking amongst the regulars, to which she replied, “Ha! Yes, sorry, we are.* Never have tried, nope, this will be our first attempt.” 

While the staff won’t be getting hands on in the actual matchmaking, Stephanie will be keeping “an eye on the slips to make sure they’re not obviously fake, but that will be the extent of our involvement.”  She also has the perfect suggestion for the avid readers that do connect with someone else on the board, ”I think people should start their first dates in the store—it’s a nice safe place to meet up with someone you don’t know!”

Prior to the board, neither Stephanie nor Christine have seen their customers make a love match in the store, but both had the same reaction (S: “That would be too cool.”/C: “That would make me SO HAPPY.”)  They have, however, had customers meet and form other sorts of relationships–a writer making friends with someone who eventually became his agent, for example.  There are also a number of couples who come into shop together.  “I love it, especially when one buys a book for the other, which happens a lot.  Sometimes the couples are super lovey-dovey and they tend to buy more books, which is awesome on every level.”

The survey participants were pretty much of the same thought about the book tastes of the person they were involved with.  Stephanie confirmed this opinion from her vantage point of observing couples,

I don’t think they have to be exactly similar, but they have to have some overlap.  I’m sure many people have their literary deal breakers, which is why we left a space for that on our form.  I’ve read a lot of books I never would have thought to pick up if they weren’t recommended to me by someone I loved/if I wasn’t trying to impress someone.  What’s most important is that they read, period.

Since the matchmaking board is still in its infancy, only time will tell if it is a success.  I’m not aware of any other bookstores offering such a service (please let me know if you hear of any other shops doing something similar and their success with it).  As Christine put it, “Let’s hope some good stuff comes from this board.”

Visit Word and add your own form to the board.  Word is located at 126 Franklin Street in Brooklyn and is open daily.  I’ll be there tomorrow night to add my own form to the board and for the Hot and Wicked Botanical Book Night! (7:30pm) with Margot  Berwin (Hothouse Flower and the Nine Plants of Desire) and Amy Stewart (Wicked Plants: The Weed that Killed Lincoln’s Mother and other Botanical Atrocities). **

*I personally love going to shops where the staff is working there because they love sharing.  Word and Bergen Street Comics are two of my favorite shops precisely because you can get into a thirty-minute conversation about something you just read with whoever is behind the counter.

** Both books are linked to Barnes & Noble only because WORD does not have online shopping yet.  Go get these books at your local bookseller though–not a big chain.

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